Don't call yourself weird or different, or eccentric, or anything like that, if your friends don't gossip so.

Any questions, just ask me.

Stereotypes…again…

I found another one feature of life can't be understood.

Why do people see me as a tempting object to be laughed at? I'm not so attractive to be asked my phone number, or so mysterious in that way…I may be so quiet, I don't talk much, but I don't keep interesting secrets about myself.

So come on, tell me, what's so fascinating about me?

 

Or maybe, the boys in my school just can't respect nerdy and not-so-good-looking girls (I mean, me myself)? They don't tease cute and girly girl, but they will happily make fun of me. Give me a break; my reaction to unpleasant jokes isn't so aggressive. At least I've tried to keep my anger on the lower floor, and it's much better right now. I'll only say, in a very low and calm voice, when I've nearly reached my limit, "Shut up or I'll bang your head with a chair." When it's still inside the limit, I'll only make a not-happy smile which indicates a mild warning. It means it's so silly; it doesn't make me laugh, so stop it.

 

So maybe, one of the reasons why I want to go abroad for my college is that I want to meet new people, who really have no idea about who I am, so I can start a new leaf, forget the old stereotypes.

 

Oh, stereotypes!

 

For the hundredth time, I'll say I hate stereotypes. It brings you nowhere into somebody's real characteristics.

listen to me.

I've got my plans all set. It's about 70 %, I only have to pass the TOEFL test with 550 score. I don't know what it is going to be.

But I caught this one thing, when one of my friends say this to me, I don't know she really meant it or not, "Geez...it's so far away from here...What if I miss you?"

What if I miss you, oh it's so touching. Really. Nobody ever said that to me. When I went to Gunung Geulis to be a very good student of Santa Ursula by participating in UYC, unexpectedly (or maybe expectedly?), no one called me. Not even the girl who said 'what if I miss you' either. I was wondering...Is it still the same when I'm gone? Well actually, if one of my friend went to some other place and we can't meet for at least, maybe, three days, it won't feel the same.

Then I started to think, oh well. Whatever. I should forget about it or I'll have not even a friend. 

I should sacrifice more and more from myself. Maybe.